Exterior Motives

Everyone has heard of ulterior motives. We all use them. For example as a little kid we tell our parents that we are going to clean our room, hoping that since we told them they will reward us.

So what are exterior motives? I'm thinking you can guess, but are you on the same wavelength as me? Perhaps not.

Exterior motives are what we show others. The masks we wear. It is what seems like our motive, but really isn't. Now this is different than an ulterior motive, for a few reasons.

1.) Ulterior motives are often seen through.

2.) Ulterior motives are used because the person wants something; whether candy, a behavior, or just an answer. They want something

Exterior motives are what others see and perceive to be your motives. People will take what you are doing and make their own decisions about it. These thoughts they have, the judgments they make about what you are doing, those are your exterior motives.

Sometimes the actions you show and the ideas a person gather are on the same track and your exterior motive is understood... other times what you do is confused by the receiver.

The main example:

Sarcasm.

When is the right time to use sarcasm? Do people always understand when it is used? Is sarcasm only a defense mechanism? Many people act in sarcasm or even act in wit all the time, it is apart of their character, but no one else understands when they do use it. Their exterior motives are confused.

Exterior: outside, outer surface

Motive: prompting to action, goal, incentive

If the point is to make a sarcastic comment, maybe to lighten the mood, but is confused and only makes things worse, then the exterior motive has been misconstrued and misunderstood.

My point is this, we should think about why people do things rather than jump the gun and get upset at them. Because maybe they act different than us, maybe they do different things to reach the same end.

~Carollela~