and the more I think,
I want to run away.
Run to the woods
on a secluded
without human touch
island
and live a earth life, off the land. In true hippie form. I will grown my own foods and raise my own animals. Sure it will involve hard work and long days. I want to separate from technology, the fast convenience that I love, and go back to horse and buggy and snail mail.
If I cannot write a letter, then it is not important what I have to say.
If I cannot get there, then it is not important that I go.
Yes, I want to go to Ireland.
Yes, I want to keep my computer.
But am I dependent on them?
Are they who shape me?
Am I serving God how he wants me to?
Does letting billions of gallons of deleterious chemicals be pumped into water systems and harming others serve a God of love?
We ask "why are people dying?" "why do people get cancer?" "how do we cure cancer?"
I can only but look back...
pre industrial revolution
pre tech mania
pre post medicine
People lived long enough. 70 years is said to have been the average life expectancy. Why are we so upset about that? We are so afraid of death. We don't talk about it. We don't even let people think about it.
At the mention of death it is said "don't think on it, you will be fine. we can take you to the doctors."
At the heart of it, we are not afraid of death. No. We are afraid of meeting God, afraid of what he would tell us.
Shall we hear "well done my good and faithful servant" when we are killing those around the world through the small actions of improving our technology?
I can hear God now
"well done good and faithful servent, you have excelled in all aspects of life. you lived for 115 years and all through out you consumed 50 of my fine cows with your wonderful steaks, and you have polluted 60 million square feet of water so you could have a computer, but that is okay because your computer helped you, despite the fact that those in Africa getting your supplies are dying and those in your homeland are dying of contaminated thirst. You excelled. You survived. They did not. Obviously you were better and deserved to survive..."
WHAT THE KIND OF THINKING IS THAT?!
Okay, I don't swear... and because of that I feel that my previous sentence almost lacks emphasis, but I need to wake up. How can I think I am serving God when everything I do challenges the living conditions of others?
Maybe I am only talking to myself...
Maybe I don't want to not feel...
I want to see, and it is hard to understand..
When you see, you are required to help...
Do I really want to see? Do I want to be responsible to help?
How do I go about helping?
There is a reason the Bible talks of the BEAUTY of creation. It was meant to be beautiful.
"The LORD is my shepherd, I lack nothing.
He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside still waters,
HE refreshes my soul."
Psalm 23
Where can I find green pastures?
Where can be found the quite clear streams?
And just a chapter before:
"My God, My God, why have you forsaken me?
Why are you so far from saving me,
so far from my cries of anguish?"
How many of us feel this way? That God is just sitting on the sidelines...
is it because we are in fact the ones killing ourselves?
~Carollela~
Help me to understand and to help. Teach me to be a servant.
